these three words…

“wait. you just said love.”

“i know.”

“does he know this?”

“no. i can’t let him know that first!”

this conversation with a friend about disclosing feelings of Love to her boyfriend (such an odd word for an adult male, but whatever) made me think about all the times i’ve held off from saying these three words, sweet and simple, short and kind (if you do not know this song, please click so that may i direct you to the nearest Stevie Wonder wonders 101 class), to someone that i felt that way about.

Stevie raised a good point with that song. when was the last time they heard you say, darling, or best friend I Love You?

the simple act of letting someone know they are Loved and cared for is a powerful thing. Love can heal, sooth, create, destroy, overcome. possibly the most powerful four-letter word we know, so often used insincerely by careless posers, and withheld by sincere but fearful carriers of its essence. even in years-old relationships, Love can become a word lost in translation, shuffled in and forgotten within the daily lives, demanding bosses, school recitals, deadlines and traffic jams. as i get older i’m starting to realize how important it is that Love isn’t lost in the trail mix of life.

an hour of conversation later, she decided that she would finally tell her boo of four months how she feels … without waiting for him to say it first. i felt a little hypocritical encouraging this, being as though i’ve struggled with whole saying I Love You thing for some time now, but even a drunk can tell you why alcoholism is bad, right?

i think with any romantic Love, there exists a small bit of fear. giving someone that ‘power’ over you. being open and vulnerable to another person’s whim of emotions, it’s scary. the courage lies in doing/saying it anyway, scared or not. so when was the last time you told him/her how you felt? would you ever say those magical three words first?

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8 comments

  1. I like and can relate to this post. For the first time in my life I had the courage to say it first. It’s not as if he couldn’t smell, taste, hear, touch, and see it in the way I did what I did for him. I think Jill said it best…”Love is like farting in a crowded elevator. People may not see who’s doing it but they sure can smell it”

  2. Great post.

    Aside: this conversation with a friend about disclosing feelings of Love to her boyfriend (such an odd word for an adult male, but whatever)

    There really needs to be a way for people 25+ to describe their partners.

  3. I wonder what the outcome was… I chewed my tongue to stop myself from saying it to someone I’d known for almost 3 years a while ago… I tell em and turns out they felt the same way.. but the situation is difficult anyway. But the feeling to know that the feelings were even mutual.. or to hear the words back? Goodness… full face flushed

  4. Great post. You did such an eloquent job of depicting the different aspects of love. Like you said, in relationships LOVE does seems to represent a type of power.

    In the past, I’ve never said it first, but that was because I truly never felt it first. Plus, I don’t believe in saying something just to say it. I prefer that my words having meaning behind them. If someday I do feel it first, I wouldn’t be afraid to let her know. I would want her to know exactly how she makes me feel and I wouldn’t do it to force her to say the same. I would want her to take her time and say it when and only if she felt that way.

  5. I’ve been the first to say it, and it worked out ok. But I’ve also been in the place where neither of us said it, and we both wondered “WTF, how does (s)he really feel about me?” I say, go for it. Express yourself.

Say it loud, say it proud... just not in all caps.

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